life of fantasy

life is full of fantasy or should i say, fairytale. everyone will encounter the same shit but in a different kind of way. somehow our ups and downs will encircle by its own. after knowing and observing others, i realise that they were just blinded by the people who is being cared and loved, the people who is standing right in front of you. those people which is not important tend to be standing beside you with open hands and along with their main purpose on it. acting or being like a ignorance. they can be as evil as you can't imagine. how evil can they be without feeling any guilty nor hard feelings. confusing ain't it? somehow on the other hand, they started to fade away from us and disappear after we realise. within it we felt regret and neglected.

summarising, I'm stress and I'm still searching and figure out something that is rushing through my ditsy mind which felt so uneasy and insecure. i don't know why but i just felt that way. if only i have a chance to rewind it back, but then again like i say before my consciousness gets over me. i still cant figure it out what was happening in me even thought i sought it through again. i was sure i was kinda frustrated for some unknown reasons which indescribable. am i thinking too much on my soul searching? i guess so. is it wrong for me to idle around and get myself trouble with everything that's in my mind? I'm just scared that I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere. in the beginning, where should i start? seriously, I'm lost and puzzled. only god knows how i felt right now and no one else could. I'm saved from the undesirable. Furthermore I'm still idle around even though i have my wonderful bestfriend. I'm glad that she's still standing strong right in front of me and who believe and have faith in me. girl, i love you like loads =)

guess, i am still way far from the truth.