bloody tuesday

Tuesday was the blast day for me. eventho starting of the day i felt so sucky but at the end of the day, i had no regret. i went to meet Lylie and Mimi at town along with my cousin, Cd. we had fun washing our eyes and laugh out lout till we had a stomach cramp. we split into 2 groups and we gave each other the score for doing something stupid and funny. we took bus to Ct Hall and chilled out at Memo while waiting for my Abg sedare, Abg mimi to come. and at around 11 we off back to Tampines. it was their stupid plan to walk inside the train from last cabin to the first for the sake of something that we did before. see, another stupid idea again. but it was kinda fun and funny thou. Mac waited for me at interchange and we vvrrooom2 to meet Haris at his block. we went for riding for awhile and off to a place where we called it "mushroom" to meet the rest. chilled there and had our chocolate tester. it was fun thou tasting different kind of chocolate from Australia which Tot's sister brought it. and play poker card and who ever win get to eat kinder bouno. haha!

And lastly, i never regret on anything that i ever done to someone. all i ever ask is just a normal one. but it seems that we cant work it out. is it so hard for me to have a normal one without anyone hanging lose on my sleeve? i dont want anyone to interfere nor being a third. i know people, you guys dont understand what im trying to say but i wanna say it in a complicated form. a simple question that i asked for him to answer but yet its hard for him to give me the answer. if he really loves me, he should be straight and easily answer my question. 50/50 aye? a simple task to do oso makes him so difficult to do and being uneasy. you tell me about it. and being myself is all you want so here i am being myself and i wont do anything about it and i swear i wont fight for something which is not worth for fighting for if that someone is still loving that person. so i dont see a point there. i will just leave u alone and be with the person you love most and i wont be such a busybody to get into the picture and i will not disturb you no more. like i told you before over and over again. you are such a fickle minded. how could you love 2 girls in a row and always giving me lame excuses and tricks which ive been there and done that..? camon, you only meet me at night and giving me excuses for no meeting in a day light. man, you sounds so wrong dude. so much of your sweet talk and pleased me.

the day have come which ive been looking forward for and im glad that i make this decision. i dont bare to take this risk and face all the consequences anymore. the more i stand strong beside him, the more painful i get. and lastly i just realise that you just treat me as a another rebound that you had before. so much of you telling me to wake up from my long sleep and yet now im widely awake and aware. now you tell me who is the 1 who have been sleeping for a long time. i swear this few months i was been fooling and toying around with my feelings by you.

for all this while i just realise that i was the only one whose clap by my ownself without someone clapping with me. coz it takes 2 bloody hands to clap. now, i shall step back and walk away cause i know i do deserve and been treated better by someone else.

PS: the old Shida is back and she will just says fuck you, smile and FUCK OFF!!!