Im Trying

the feeling of lonely, disappointed and sucky is controlling me now and sometime its getting on my nerve. i did tried many ways to forget bout him and avoid that feeling. especially during at night where i cant sleep. so i tend to go out with my friends and accompany them, playing longboard, skating, photo shots, fly kite, and other activities. after doing all those activities, somehow i know i will be very tired and sleepy, so when i reach home, straight away i will dozed off. if im in school, i will try to concentrate on it and study hard. see how hard i try my best to get myself busy with life and not to think of anything which rushing through my ditsy mind. it bottles up to much that i get myself insecure, douth and naive.

love is a big word and i think that i cant get myself to fall in love again with someone else. i might like someone but to fall for it, i have douth on it. im scared and forbia. scared of getting myself hurt again and have this kind of feeling. it hurts to deep that i hardly breathe and stand up strong. my friends encounter alot of shit in relationship and after hearing it, i bacame scared. how how how?